Learn Your Special Education Laws, Special Education Rights, and Share IEP Goal Ideas

Attention special needs parents.  I want to share with you two things you can do today to decrease your stress and worry.

But first, want to acknowledge that if you are like most of the parents I know raising a child with special needs, you are stressed and you are worried.

And you have good reason to be stressed.  You have good reason to be worried.

So before we talk about skills and strategies and ways to manage the big challenges on our agendas let us first say that whatever you are thinking and feeling about the situation you find yourself it is likely extremely reasonable.

When our children struggle, we struggle.  Often our children need us to be cheerleaders and advocates but we are also scared and anxious.  We are worried about the future and we may be struggling in the present. Read the rest of this entry →

I  just came across an article called “The 5 Best Tips for Parenting Special Needs Children.” Tip #2 was Get a Dog. Forgive me for not jumping on the warm and fuzzy bandwagon of running out to get a dog. Don’t get me wrong. I absolutely love dogs and the article is right: pets do help with stress release and learning responsibility. And yet, THAT made Tip #2?

My reaction is caused partly by the thought that if family life is already stressed and parenting is a difficult challenge, then bringing in another family member might not be such a good idea right at that time. It’s important to make sure that the current family members are living respectfully together before a new member is added.

Here are 5 ideas to incorporate into parenting a special needs child – before you start looking for a puppy. Read the rest of this entry →

One of the most devastating calls you can receive as a parent is the School calling to tell you they have initiated an expulsion proceeding against your child due to poor behavior. If your child has an Individualized Education Program (“IEP”) before the expulsion process can start they must hold a Manifestation Determination review. This review must be held within 10 days of the conduct. At which time the IEP team must review the complete file and consider all relevant information, including the IEP, any teacher observations, and any information supplied by the parents. The IEP team must then answer two questions: Read the rest of this entry →

Applying for Disability Benefits for Your Child

Caring for a special needs child can be a full time job—at home research, medical appointments, and finding trustworthy supportive care may cause parents to reach unexpected financial and emotional obstacles. If you or a loved one can no longer financially support a child with an illness or disability, it may be time to explore the Social Security Disability options available to you. Read the rest of this entry →

In the special needs community, children are given labels based on their disability.  The most common diagnosis a child may be given are Autism, ADHD or Specific Learning Disability; in fact, the most common eligibility for an IEP in this country is Specific Learning Disability.  Ask yourself this question….does the label your child has be given accurately define all their areas of need?  In many cases it does not; many children may have one diagnosis but also exhibit symptoms from other disabilities as well.  Maybe your child has a Learning Disability but they also have Sensory Processing issues as well.  Your child may have a diagnosis of Autism but also exhibits symptoms of ADHD or ODD too.  For some children, they might have any of the three most common disabilities and also experience struggles with Mental Health.  I think it’s safe to say that most children have multiple areas of need. Read the rest of this entry →

With Valentine’s Day upon us I thought it was important for me to try and explain the love I have for my family. My life changed 18 years ago when I met my wife and again almost 11 year ago when I had my son. These two moments in time are not just mere events in my past but have become a part of me. Since I am not as eloquent as E.E. Cummings the best way to explain this feeling is by reading his poem, I Carry Your Heart With Me:

i carry your heart with me (i carry it in my heart) i am never without it (anywhere i go you go, my dear; and whatever is done by only me is your doing, my darling)

i fear no fate (for you are my fate, my sweet) i want no world (for beautiful you are my world, my true) and it’s you are whatever a moon has always meant and whatever a sun will always sing is you

here is the deepest secret nobody knows (here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud and the sky of the sky of a tree called life; which grows higher than the soul can hope or mind can hide) and this is the wonder that’s keeping the stars apart

i carry your heart (i carry it in my heart)

I think this poem has meaning for anyone in love, or with a family, but it seems to especially ring true for families raising children with special needs. Every day I go out into the world, I carry my family’s heart. A heart so big it changed who I was and what I was capable of doing.

Every time I encounter ignorance, prejudice and social bias against individuals with disabilities I think about my family and my response is guided by their heart. Because, just like in the poem I carry their heart (I carry it in my heart).

Every time I see a child having a meltdown in the grocery store or a restaurant I think about my family and I show a little understanding and compassion. Because, just like in the poem I carry my family’s heart (I carry it in my heart).

Every time I see a Mom crying at an IEP meeting I try to help her to the best of my abilities. Because, just like in the poem I carry my family’s heart (I carry it in my heart).

Every time I see a child who cannot hit or catch or shoot a basket I tell their parents to keep looking because every child has strengths and they will find what they are good at just as my son found swimming. Because, just like in the poem I carry my family’s heart (I carry it in my heart).

Every time I see a parent who is just about at their wits end, I tell them it’s okay and that we have all been there. Just continue to move forward and don’t worry if sometimes you need to move one step backwards in order to move two steps forward. Because, just like in the poem I carry my family’s heart (I carry it in my heart).

These are all things I was not capable of in my youth. Before I met my wife and had my son. Before I carried their heart with me everywhere I go. You see I am changed forever, first by my wife and later by my son. My wife’s strength and compassion coupled by my son’s love for life shaped who I am today the same way a river shapes the landscape around them. Because, just like in the poem I carry my family’s heart (I carry it in my heart).

Originally Published February 14, 2012

When a child is first diagnosed with a disability, parents must learn a lot in a short time if they want their child to receive the best services. Finding that information can be challenging, but NICHCY is here to help. Has your child been classified as having an “Other Health Impairment”? NICHCY’s fact sheet can help clarify what that means. Has your child experienced a Traumatic Brain Injury? NICHCY’s fact sheet can help you understand how that disability affects learning.

NICHCY’s Disability Fact Sheets are our most popular web pages. Each fact sheet includes a definition, causes, characteristics, how common the disability is in school-age children, educational considerations, and helpful organizations for further information. Most also include supports broken down by age group, tips for teachers, tips for parents, and a brief story of a child with the disability. The fact sheets are a great starting point for anyone who is living or working with a child who has a disability. Many are also available in Spanish—easy to read, easy to share. Read the rest of this entry →

Special Education in America has come very far in the 30 plus years since the Education for All Handicapped Children Act was passed.  The problem is somewhere along the way the spirit of the law and the practice of the law started to breakdown.  The cornerstone of the special education law is the Individualized Education Program (IEP) and decisions about the IEP are decided at an IEP team meeting.  The IEP becomes useless if the IEP team meeting goes off task.  Unfortunately, instead of a team, often it becomes parents against the school and a massive communication breakdown occurs.  There can be a significant lack of trust on both sides.  Many times I hear from School personnel, “Why don’t parents think we are capable of assessing their children properly?”  While on the other side parents think schools are turning them down for eligibility and services due to lack of funds when their children really need help. Read the rest of this entry →

It’s a time to celebrate with family and friends and enjoy whatever holiday traditions you have come to know and love. It’s the time to hit the malls for bargain shopping and cross all those gifts off of our to-do list.  Also, with a New Year approaching many of us will make New Year’s resolutions.  Before we can make a New Year’s resolution, we have to take a moment and reflect upon the past year…..of course that would also include the subject of Parenthood. Read the rest of this entry →

Some time ago I was reading a post by a parent who was commenting on her surprise that her child was suddenly gaining a myriad of skills – seemingly out of the blue. This was not just happening in one area, but in multiple areas: her previously non-verbal child was using new words and in the correct social context, and also trying new foods, and open to new sensory experiences.

What I have noticed over the years with H is that his progress is anything but even – especially if we look at it on a small scale. There are days when it has definitely felt like the cliché two steps forward – one step back. (However, I suppose there is often truth or reality at the centre of a cliché – and a noticing of a pattern or a tendency – or it wouldn’t be a cliché in the first place.) Read the rest of this entry →